Ryan Seacrest should be on the Supreme Court.
American Idol is back! Am I blogging it? Of course! What else would I have to do? I am sure I can finish this semester's syllabi and grade last semester's exams by April at the very least. Starbuck's is open late!
I broke down in tears when a cowboy named Garet Johnson, who has never been on an airplane or had any singing lessons, explained how he sings Elton John songs to his turkeys "because there is no people to sing to." He lives in a town where people do not like to hear cowboy turkey love songs. They are so partisan! The most touching moment came when he explained how he once told one of his turkeys, "I don't know how to quit you!" To quit singing Elton John songs to the bird, of course. I wept.
American Idol this season is like the Alito hearings. Samuel Alito is like a cowboy, singing his nonpartisan songs of Elton John to the Democratic "turkeys." But his songs of law need to be sung on the airplane of the highest court in all the land! And no "Senator Simon Kennedy" should stop him. I am weeping as I type this.
Did I mention I was a lawprof? Here is a picture of the Alito Cowboy. He is singing "Crocodile Rock." But he is a turkey and not a crocodile! What a hoot.
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/402/1998/320/turkey.jpg)
UPDATE: As a lawprof, I have to say that I have no sympathy at all for so-called "parody blogs." They are partisan snares! This person is in serious legal hot water. As a lawprof, I think he is in big trouble. And rightly so. What a partisan!
Did you ever wonder if "tungsten" would be a good name for a flavor of ice cream?
I broke down in tears when a cowboy named Garet Johnson, who has never been on an airplane or had any singing lessons, explained how he sings Elton John songs to his turkeys "because there is no people to sing to." He lives in a town where people do not like to hear cowboy turkey love songs. They are so partisan! The most touching moment came when he explained how he once told one of his turkeys, "I don't know how to quit you!" To quit singing Elton John songs to the bird, of course. I wept.
American Idol this season is like the Alito hearings. Samuel Alito is like a cowboy, singing his nonpartisan songs of Elton John to the Democratic "turkeys." But his songs of law need to be sung on the airplane of the highest court in all the land! And no "Senator Simon Kennedy" should stop him. I am weeping as I type this.
Did I mention I was a lawprof? Here is a picture of the Alito Cowboy. He is singing "Crocodile Rock." But he is a turkey and not a crocodile! What a hoot.
![](http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/402/1998/320/turkey.jpg)
UPDATE: As a lawprof, I have to say that I have no sympathy at all for so-called "parody blogs." They are partisan snares! This person is in serious legal hot water. As a lawprof, I think he is in big trouble. And rightly so. What a partisan!
Did you ever wonder if "tungsten" would be a good name for a flavor of ice cream?
82 Comments:
"Deep Thoughts" by Ann Altmouse.
Your humanity moves me to tears.
I, for one, believe that American Idol is the most partisan show on TV.
You have three non-partisan partisans sitting in front of singing cowboys and nerds...giving their opinions!!
Television is supposed to be unbiased, dear Ms. Altmouse. If it were, we'd have more Golden Girls, and less Judge Judy.
I think that it would better you to reflect on your pictures of downtown Madison than to push such hot button issues.
Idol Hands Are The Partisan's Workshop.
However, if television has taught us anything, it's that Democrats are too partisan to be allowed to judge, ask questions, become lawyers (or proflaws), or run for political office.
So from now on, whenever a Democrat appears on some program like C-Span spouting their partisan nonsense, let's not listen!
Tungsten wouldn't be a good name for an ice cream flavor unless the ice cream were actually made with tungsten. Otherwise, it's just make-believe...why bother?
Phosphotungstic acid might be a good form to use, although it's mildly poisonous and damages sperm. If that worries you, try Di-tungsten tetra(hpp), which you can make by converting tungsten hexacarbonyl with 1,3,4,6,7,8-hexahydro-2H-pyrimido[1,2-a]pyrimidine (Hhpp) in o-dichlorobenzene at 200 °C to W2(hpp)4Cl2.
"Lapis Ponderosus" would probably be a more marketable name.
'Tungsten' has its charm, but I prefer 'Depleted Uranium'.
As anyone who has read On Plymouth Plantation knows, turkey love songs--the necessary precursor to turkey sex--are a noble part of our American tradition. And not even partisan, because who was more fair, more open-minded, than the Puritans?
But then why would a blogging proflaw read On Plymouth Plantation? My mistake.
"tungsten" has to be the most partisan, sexist name for ice cream that I have ever heard!
I love it
I like Ben and Jerry's Pizazzy Zinc and Pistachio ice cream.
Phila, you are on notice. Comments will be deleted unless you present an argument and not a nonargument. You need to be more like Sam Alito.
And do not even think about trying to sneak wolfram into this discussion...it is also a nonargument. Choose either Antonin Scalia or Clarence Thomas as a role model, and you will soon know the rewards of proflaw nonpartisanship.
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Humans are emotional creatures. No matter how strong we portray ourselves to be, we always end up in a puddle of tears, when we are forced to leave behind something or someone who happened to be very close. However, as life would have it, often due to academic or professional commitments we are forced to leave a familiar town, city, country and at times even the continent.
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Homesickness kicks in a few weeks or months after you have settled in your new place. Once the initial business of settling down is over, theadreline high of moving to a new place wears off. That is when things start to get gloomy. Do not give into your desire of visiting your old place too soon. Instead focus on your new home. If you happen to miss your extended family and friends you can ask them to come and spend some time with you.
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Staying busy perhaps is the best medicine for almost all types of emotional problem. Understand the fact that you have to function in your new environment and feeling depressed would only add to your problems. Focus your attention on your work and make use of modern age technology to like Skype to stay connected with your friends. Spend time in cooking your local delicacy, once your packers and movers from Mumbai deliver all the kitchen supplies.
Feeling down is a common symptom after moving to a new space. Give yourself some time and develop a support system. Gradually as your heart settles in the new place, you shall discover that you have created a new home in a new city that once used to be a foreign place.
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