Monday, February 13, 2006

The squirrel-y nuts of Kos.

Armanio over at Daily Kos is making vicious fun of beautiful nonpartisans like myself in a very clumsy way, calling us the "theoretically not stupid folks [who are] wondering what hit them in the Left Blogosophere." I wondered for minute what a "blogosophere" was for about fifteen minutes until I realized I had dribbled Diet Coke on my sweater and a fly was stuck in my left nostril. What a "buzz"! But what sort of a word is "blogosophere" anyway? When I grow up I want to be a "blogosophile" and live in "Blogosophopolis" and eat "blogospholopochips" with "sour cream and onion blogosopholopidip." Ha ha! What a hoot....

Do you ever wonder why squirrels are talking about you behind your back? I do. That is why I always hide my acorn collection in my cheeks when I walk across campus.

Sigh...

UPDATE: Oh yes, Ariosto from Daily Kos. He wonders why I believe that Democrats need to follow the sound advice of the nonpartisan site Red State and stop being mad at the very moderate decisions of the Bush administration. As if that is such an absurd proposition.

All he can do is sneer and explain why he is mad at Bush. Oh yeah? Oh YEAH? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah. Well you answer this. I represent every vote you need to win. Not only do I have my own vote; I also have the command of an army of renegade but extremely nonpartisan squirrels who will push whatever lever I command because I am the Mistress of Acorns. Does Arbusto from Daily Kos not know that a moderate nonpartisan like myself is essential to any election because of our command of the acorn vote? How does he mean to persuade us with the tone of bitter nuttiness that pervades every post that he makes? Does he not fear my use of italics?

I watch the Colbert Report every night, and only the squirrels and I really understand the joke! Why is this not convincing proof of my nonpartisanship? The fools! THE FOOLS! Why can they not see how very necessary I am?

Arguendo simply cannot comprehend the threat posed by my acorn-frenzied squirrel army. It is a mystery why so many people on the Left are so blinded by partisanship that they cannot appeal to the reasonable center, as so perfectly represented by myself.



UPDATE: I'd thought a link from Kos would increase traffic stats. It hasn't. This has caused me to lose interest in the entire disagreement with Orlando. How was I to know he wasn't Kos just because his name was different and he didn't link from the Kos main page? The conclusion is inescapable: Kos is avoiding me, just as does Atrios, who never links here. Cowards! I will argue with Monsanto again when he kills Kos and seizes control of the blog. And NO he may not rent out my squirrel commandos for this purpose. They are nonpartisan, after all.

UPDATE: I am unsure of whether or not to disagree with this guy because I do not know how many hits he gets. All I know is that his life must be very boring because he has nothing better to do after watching the first third of a movie except watch the rest of it. How dull! His imagination must be very stunted, probably because he was abused as a child, perhaps because of an acute bowel disease. That is I suppose what would make him never miss a chance to insult someone like me, someone who has never insulted him and is totally neutral when it comes to politics.

UPDATE: Did I mention I always watch The Colbert Report? I'll also laugh if you make an obscene gesture at Dick Cheney, because I am hip and "with it." But it will not win my vote because I value civil discourse. That is clear.

40 Comments:

Blogger Aspasia M. said...

WHAT is that squirrel Doing?
That picture is extremely disturbing.

7:51 PM  
Blogger flory said...

geoduck2 -- I think that's a (bad)Cheney imitation. Package and all.


Dearest Blogmadame:
I'm pretty sure Atrios has linked you at least once. So you really shouldn't say mean things about him.

8:49 PM  
Blogger Ann Altmouse said...

Flory, Atrios has only linked here ironically. That does not count as a link according to SiteMeter. You need to work on your reading comprehension.

Geoduck2, that sort of comment is why the Democrats keep losing. You appear to have given no thought to how poorly that would go over in the heartland.

9:10 PM  
Blogger Jacques Cuze said...

How dare you use the squirrel without linking to FARK! You demand others link to you, but you refuse to link to them!

You are a partisan partisan partisan woman!

9:48 PM  
Blogger Jacques Cuze said...

Ann, the wikipedia awaits you

(You do have an entry on this page.)

9:52 PM  
Blogger roy said...

His imagination must be very stunted, probably because he was abused as a child, perhaps because of an acute bowel disease.

Well, like they say, a stopped clock is still right twice a day.

8:06 AM  
Blogger refinnej said...

You with the squirrel... Watch where you point that thing!!!

11:27 AM  
Blogger flory said...

I wondered for minute what a "blogosophere" was for about fifteen minutes until I realized I had dribbled Diet Coke on my sweater and a fly was stuck in my left nostril.

Whatever you're pouring over your cheerios, I hope somebody brings a sample to EschaCon II.

9:18 PM  
Blogger Phila said...


Ann Altmouse said...
Flory, Atrios has only linked here ironically. That does not count as a link according to SiteMeter. You need to work on your reading comprehension.


Does pity count with SiteMeter? 'Cause I'll give you a dozen links on that basis, easy.

10:24 PM  
Blogger Nim said...

I would have enjoyed this insightful insight even more if it had another picture of Winnie the Pooh, instead of a squirrel.

Although I'm a little troubled that Winnie the Pooh seems to look a little like a...Democrat.

8:50 AM  
Blogger GWPDA said...

I think you're mean. A BIG MEANY. GEORGE MEANEY. maybe.

But you're definitely mean.

7:38 AM  
Anonymous Kathleen said...

fine fine work.

2:28 PM  
Blogger K. Ron Silkwood said...

Dear Diva Blogress, I am sure the upstarts do not know what to make of your use of italics, and they tremble in their ignorance. Your shift in font has thrown their non-arguments into complete disarray. Once again you prove the force and impact of the proper italicized word.

11:45 AM  
Anonymous freq flag said...

You know what I do whenever squirrels talk about me behind my back? I turn right around and face them so that my back is behind me!

I then instruct them (in a nonpartisan and civil manner, of course!) to shape up and look at themselves in a mirror.

It is because of this reasonable and centered approach, I hardly ever have any problems with squirrels.

Occasionally, a blindly partisan squirrel will challenge me with an uncivil nonargument, at which time I must resort to the old acorn-acorn-walnut shell game. They are only squirrels, after all.

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